dancing

Yesterday we danced in the living room, all 4 (5!) of us. The girls begged their daddy to play them a song from his phone that had "sympasizers" (that would be "synthesizers" - they are their daddy's girls in this regard) and we all held hands and went really crazy.

I only lasted about 2 minutes, however, so then I got to sit in a chair and watch my children. I have been taking a lot of joy in this lately, doing my best to appreciate these sweet moments for what they are, these last days of "just us" before our hearts and lives are expanded by the arrival of another little blessing.

Sophie danced with purpose. She assumed a graceful, serious look and tipped her head. She hopped and kicked her feet in a deliberate fashion. Her princess dress swirled and she delighted in twirling (if you used to read my old blog and recall Sophie's first twirl, you'll agree that not much has changed).

Aida took a more relaxed tone. She plastered a goofy smile on her face and shook her upper body to the rhythm. She particularly likes to move her arms up and down in time to the music, wagging her head back and forth. It's what we call "The Aida." She did a lot of that.

And then these sisters caught each other's eye and started laughing, spinning faster and faster until they were careening through the living room like kids playing "Dizzy Bat" and I was practically going into labor watching all of the narrow-misses and almost-disasters. We finally had to cut them off for pj time - I think they could have gone all night. Or at least for another half hour.

Sweet moments. Precious days. Thanking God for each one.

(Yes, even the ones like today when we ended up with poop on the floor - what?! - and a little bit of banishment to the bedroom for yelling at Mommy. Even these moments can be redeemed. So I thank God for them, too.)

california: revisited

I posted some pictures of our visit to the beach in Santa Barbara a while back and fully intended to post more pictures from that trip soon after. But, as I am attempting to slow down where I can, things like this little blog have slowed down, too (as I'm sure you've noticed).

I also think that one of the reasons I am terrible about posting vacation pictures is that I don't want to offend anyone. Are there equal amounts of everyone? Does it look like I love one sibling more than the other? Am I being ridiculous? Yes.

I loved this trip because I felt like we had some special time with everyone. That's not necessarily reflected in these pictures. Sometimes it's nice to put the camera down and just enjoy life. Family, I love you and miss you and thank you for showing us such a fabulous time.

Here are some snapshots of our time in CA.

(Look at my dad, then look at Aida.)

the best laid plans...

So, the girls have been doing this inside since Christmas:

And now that spring has arrived we (meaning especially me) have a strong desire to get those trikes out of the house and into some good outdoor use. Helmets were purchased and plans made to visit a local park on Elijah's first day of Spring Break. I envisioned my children riding along paths with glee, relishing the space and length after being confined to maneuvers up and down our (very short) hallway. Plus, there would be slides, swings, and even a creek in which to throw little rocks - a favorite pastime in this family.

We arrived at the park. Within 4 minutes both girls were in tears. The bikes hadn't even made it out of the car. The wind was too cold, the slide was too high, life was not all they wanted it to be. Elijah and I loaded them back into their carseats without a word, climbed into the car ourselves, took one look at each other, and busted up laughing. Life with children (and particularly with twins, I think) has taught us to do that. I love my husband.

We drove around looking for pink trees (the delight of trees in bloom!) and arrived home in higher spirits. So then what did they want to do? Head into the backyard to play on our "playground", of course.

with thanks

Thank you all for your prayers for me and my little family. I can tangibly feel them and the contractions have lessened a bit, and therefore the anxiety. I am grateful for you.

Also, I had no idea when I wrote my last post that I would get so many offers to help clean my house! That was not my underlying intent, I promise. :) But thank you all for those, too, because they remind me that I am not alone and instead part of a community of love, from here to California and back.

So, this is where we are today. Elijah is on his first day of Spring Break. Our children have scattered their toys across the living room floor. There is a loaf of bread cooling on the counter and the sun is shining outside. My treasures are all curled up together and I am thinking it is time to join them.

be still

I am now 28 weeks pregnant and entering my final trimester.

I am 3 weeks away from the point at which my first girls were born.

I am frantic, and frantically trying not to be that way.

Those darn Braxton-Hicks contractions, which I've been having for over 2 months now, are upping their frequency. And while I know it is most likely a genetic trait (thanks, Mom!) that causes my uterus to tighten with such regularity these days and not a signal of impending premature labor, I also know that I need to slow down. Take a deep breath - or 20. Start to let things go.

Spring cleaning? Not happening here this year. (Baseboards, you get a few more seasons to be disgusting.) Pruning the boxwoods and planting petunias? Probably not. The front of our house will be okay even if it must be flowerless this year. Decorate the baby's room?...we'll see.

And all of the church services that usher us into this beautiful and difficult season of Lent? Well, we may or may not make it. My heart aches to be there - especially because we missed them all last year, when Lent was our own season of grief and healing at home - but my body (and my husband!) remind me that this just may not be the season for that.

A song that we sing in the atrium at Church with our 3-6 year olds has been continually running through my head this past week, repeating one of my favorite lines from Psalm 46 - "Be still and know that I am God." I'm not always great at being still. But this is my time to do just that - to soak in these moments with my girls, to seek to slow down time rather than rush it away, to commend my soul and my body (and my worries) to God.

Pray for me, friends, and I'll pray for you. I've got some extra time to do that these days. :)